The Doc Block Clinic

[Blocking Ace]

The Art of Blocking
:pray:
Part 1 [Extract]

Find yourself a nice Big Blade [preferably Swedish or Japanese wood].
Apply normal reverse rubbers [Japanese] at least 1.8mm.

Personally, I find the next bit is tricky -- pick the bat up without straining or dropping the thing.

Adopt a nice relaxed stance [without resorting to tranquilisers]. Some people say 'loose or soft hands', but, personally, i would advise keeping distance from people with overly 'loose' hands. Stand between 3 millimetres and eighteen inches away from end of table.

Do try to obtain the services of a consistent ORTHODOX player [that rules out approx. 75% of players in this region], who will supply a never-ending stream of good quality looping and driving [Oh come on, there must be someone].

There endeth the first lesson. Don't worry, the series will continue. But , i do not want everybody to try and run before they can walk [or at least make little baby-steps].

Coming next -- 'Getting Down to Work'.

[Annie]

The Art of Blocking
:pray:
Part 1 [Extract]

Find yourself a nice Big Blade

http://i40.photobucket.com/albums/e215/basil2000/comic1.gif
CHECK!

[Spongebob!]

:dance3:Quality Blocking Ace and Annie - look forward to the next gripping chapter of the Blocking Manual...

[Blocking Ace]

The Art of Blocking [Extract from Part 2]

A solid stance is vital.

For the backhand block, one should adopt the 'Double Lee' position. This is a combination of Bruce Lee and Lee Van Cleef.

For the forehand, i would recommend the 'Double Bruce' stance. This alternates between Bruce Lee and Bruce Forsyth [depending on how energetic you are feeling].

Grip the bat like Clint Eastwood does in that film A Fistful of Schildkrot. None of this 'loose' hands nonsense. Grip till your knuckles turn white.

Warn your opponent - "The safety-catch of my blade is off. Now, do you feel lucky?" See if he/she can hit/loop the ball past you. [Obviously, you cannot expect to achieve my superior standard without putting in a lot of quality practice [at least 40 minutes anyway].
---
To close, here is an illustration. Picture the scene:
The great Alan Ransome, when observing the legendary Brad Billington demonstrating the block, passed the following gem of advice to the onlooking hopefuls:
"Bradley is six feet tall. But, when he plays the block - he is 5 feet 10".
----
Well, i think that says it all. Need I say more.

[Series to be continued in Part 3]

Relax. Wake up and smell the rubber.

[Blocking Ace]

The Art of Blocking [Extract from Part 3]

When faced with a loop/drive zipping straight at you, remember the 'Three Its': 1) Look at it. 2) Think about it. 3) Do it.

I tend to favour blocking on the backhand, as that is where i have my black rubber. The word 'black' resembles the word 'block'. Therefore, it is naturally adapted for that stroke. [This is partially psychological].

Think about it. would the Northern Rock have endured so much turmoil if it had been called 'Northern Block'. Of course not. It makes sense.

Also try to dress in black. As much black as possible. The opponents at my last match were unsure whether i was in a state of mourning, or whether i was Zorro reincarnated.

Its psychological you know.

To be continued in Part 4.

[Spinmaster]

Mind games are a wonderful tactic as we all know, sadly mine are not as clever as yours!

[DaveR]

The Ace Blockers strategy is clear and very concise, with the three "its" well actually theres a few more "its"

Smack it being one in particular...............never understood the blocking mentallity with the main strategy being you live of someone elses pace, if they happened to have any that is !

[The Windmill]

OK....its time to come clean.....WHO is the Blocking Ace ? are you a relative of the STIG ?

[DaveR]

Well im being honest here.................i know but should the identity of the masked Blocking Ace be revealed to the general public?

The clues will be given as he goes through his block tactics ........art of blocking

[Spongebob!]

I know.......

[Blocking Ace]

The Art of Blocking [Extract from Part 4]

Of course, one problem the master blocker encounters is the opponent who fails to generate pace, or even pushes.

Don't panic, don't panic.

I have developed a special stroke which merges the block with the flick. I have christened this devastating shot The Blick.

In a blink, i can conjure a blick with my black rubber - a blinking black blick, in fact.

As they say in the world of fashion - "Blocking is the new black". Remember, you should already be kitted out in black gear.

Another variation of the stroke occurs when you are standing about 2 mm away from table, crouching almost on top of net, and what does your opponent do? He/she blasts the ball at you.
Don't panic. React. Stay alert, and you can still perform a subtle Retard Block, which involves blocking the ball whilst smartly withdrawing the racket face backwards. It may look like you have suffered a nervous convulsion, but Des Douglas could perform this shot occasionally. And he was a fair blocker.

[To be continued in Part 5] Look out for a 'special edition', where my pal Waldi will guest edit as we explore the intricacies of The Sidespin Block.

[DaveR]

The Retard Block now thats sounds interesting, by the way "Des was a fair blocker"........is slightly underestimating how good the guy was !

Special edition............now lets make this the long version with some detailed explanation for those of us who just plain and simply cant blick, block, tick or tock !

[Blocking Ace]

The Art of Blocking [extract from Part 5]

Pay attention. Playing with red on forehand, and black on backhand is the only civilised, sane mode of play. So, if i ever mention the Red Block or Black Block, remember that i am not referring to some obscure Communist or Racial undeground political movement.

Never be fazed if your opponent throws up a lob. I would recommend the Smother-Block [contact is made before the ball rises more than about 3-4 inches]. The Sidespin-Block can also be deployed in the same manner.
---
[Waldi will elaborate on the Sidespin variation in his 'special' edition, but 'the great one' is holding out for an 'appearance' fee. He is currently demanding 50,000 Swedish Krona (that's about £47.50 in English sterling) , and a night out with any good-looking members of 'tabletennistalk'. I've told him to forget the latter, he'd be safer sticking to a cash-only transaction.

I think he is deliberately prolonging negotiations because we are practicing together and he is desperate to learn more about my blocking innovations. He says, "Master, you have given me a Mental Block". But, I reply softly "Ah, Glasshopper [err, I mean Waldi] be patient. He who tries to block tide - get very very wet"].
---
Still to come. More sidespin block, mental block, and the 'holy grail' whose very existence is doubted by some - the Chop-Block.

[Blocking Ace]

The Art of Blocking [Extract from Part 6]

When it is your serve, it is vital that you serve fairly long. The opponent believes that this is a mistake and will be able to topspin or drive the return. Thus permitting you to block around the clock.

----
Bruce Lee once said "Be like Water, my friend". That advice is all very well, to a point. But, realistically, the Blocker needs to think more in terms of being "Like a Brick".
To paraphrase an old public information film: "Think Once. Think Twice. Think Brick". [As in brick wall of course]. The Blocker is 'The Wall'. The ball is the, errrm...., ball. Quite Simple. And simplicity is to be applauded.
I like to think I am fairly simple, and it appears to be the general consensus. No applause necessary.
----

Table tennis is the new Rock n' Roll. And, of course, Block and Roll is another of my blocking techniques. Always remember that "A rolling block gathers no spin".

Waldi will contribute to the series when I finally manage to drag him away from the roulette wheel, and dice tables, in the Stockholm casinos. He is a bit of high roller, but has gone off pontoon since it changed from 21 high to 11.

[TheMoose]

Applause all round, the series gets more tactical everyday !

[Blocking Ace]

The Art of Blocking [Extract from Part 7]

Admittedly. some streaky players can produce the odd sidespin block or two. Consistency should be a key factor though.
Waldi [a competely random example] creates the subtle wrist movement by duplicating his 'flicky' dice-throwing, and roulette-wheel-spinning, manoeuvres from the casino [he still owes me a few hundred pounds incidentally]. Do not try this at home [or the practice hall] without supervision, or paramedics on standby.

I have to confess that I am not particularly adept at the Chop-Block. However, i know someone who is - The Masked Blocker [no, we are not related]. He will offer some advice in the next section of the series.

I have a Big Match this evening, so excuse me as i need to get into the zone.
The Ace is now moving into the Block Zone. Enter at your peril.

[Blocking Ace]

The Art of Blocking [Extract from Part 8]

I have had to draft in the servives of The Masked Blocker to provide some insights on the Chop-Block.

The masked one only spent ten years in England so, quite understandably, he does not speak a word of English.
Never mind. I will describe what he is demonstrating. He [yes the MB is male], is advancing in a fencing-type thrust stance with his right hand. He subtly flicks his wrist downwards to impart the backspin with slight backhand sideways movment too. -- Masterly. -- At same time he voices the carefully considered, and helpful, exclamation "Augghh".
Then a stunt. OOOh!

N.B. The cartwheel is, I presume, optional.

Well, the scales have fallen from my eyes. I now feel greatly enlightened on the intricacies of this potentially devastating shot. Thank you so much Xinh[...] err, I mean, Masked Blocker, for imparting your wisdom.
The Masked Blocker appeared courtesy of Cartwheel Enterprises plc.

Copyright regulations apply. Permission is required to quote the Masked Blocker.

[DaveR]

Part 8 is way above many players ability ........the chop block is a shot only for the master blocker, people like myself !

[Spongebob!]

and me...! :rocker:

[FantasyCheeseBasin]

if anyone needs to know an effective way to block go watch the sponge,ive seen him block a 450mph lash down the line many times,one of his best shots,an excellent exponent of the art,however his forehand topspin sucks,:thtease:

[Blocking Ace]

The Art of Blocking [extract from Part 9]

Philosophy; or Mental Blocking
Streaky, or bad-tempered hypocritical players [just view certain other threads], are not natural blockers. For a start they have difficuly peering at the ball through their reddened tearful eyes. They do not possess the intellectual capacity, and discipline, to engage in constructive blocking.

The true Blocker enters a higher plane of consciousness, Grasshopper.

Step 1 - Clear the mind - that didn't take long did it.
Step 2 - Fill the void so that it is now Chock-a-Block with Negativity [that's negativity in the positive sense, you understand. Just go with me].
Step 3 - Skip to the table * Blockitty-Block, Blockitty-Block * [that was just a sound effect i threw in to enhance your online experience].
Step 4 - Move to the right, block and block. Move to the left, block and block. Back to the middle, block and block. And so forth. Cha-cha-cha. Cha-cha-cha.

As the 'Special One' [Waldi] said - "Just Block, Baby". [Well, he should have said it anyway].

[Blocking Ace]

The Art of Blocking [extract from Part 10

One of the few advantages that the drastically underweight player posesses is the ability to deploy the strategy of Stealth Blocking.

As one who is painfully thin, almost skeletal, I am well qualified to advise.

Whilst in the midst of brilliantly blocking opponent's drives and loops, I simply turn sideways. This renders me invisible [true, the opponent may see what appears to be a floating bat] --- I can now slip under the enemy's radar [a bit like a US airforce stealth-bomber].

There will be some serious carpet blocking. I am a Stealth Blocker.
This is your captain speaking, "We are ready for take-off, please fasten your shoelaces. We will be blocking at a height of approximately four feet, and the ball will be reaching a speed of over one hundred miles per hour".
Thank you for flying Air Doctor.

As the 'Backhand Clash' once sang:
"I fought the Block, and the Block won;
I fought the Block, and the Block won".

[Blocking Ace]

Out of interest, is there a demand to continue this series. Or has novelty value worn off by now?

[The Windmill]

220 views till now says it all........keep it going.....

[Blocking Ace]

The Art of Blocking [Extract from Part 11]

Don't do drugs. But, if you are going to take medication, then for goodness sake make it Beta-Blockers. I don't know what they do, exactly, but their name means that they are likely to be super-duper.

One mode of the stroke that i do not recommend is the Shock-Block, as deployed by Kalin Kreanga. Usually, blocking is relatively passive, but his backswing when blocking is just ridiculous.
----
You may observe his technique in the forthcoming feature film: 'Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Blocks'.
This British Blockbuster [that is a further variation of the stroke yet to be discussed] stars Jan-Ove Waldner as 'The Man With No Name', Kreanga as 'Shock-Block Vinnie'. Werner Schlager as 'The Jackal', and Matt Syed as 'Grasshopper'.
-----
The Chinese National Squad were in charge of make-up and catering.
Mr. Waldner's costumes were supplied by Donic and Asda [in that order].

[Hovis Bread Eater]

What about the Chop Block - Or would it be something that Harry and Fantasy would just eat.....

[HarryBelafonte]

Is doc block a member of sons of the desert?

[FantasyCheeseBasin]

The Art of Blocking [extract from Part 9]

Philosophy; or Mental Blocking
Streaky, or bad-tempered hypocritical players [just view certain other threads], are not natural blockers. For a start they have difficuly peering at the ball through their reddened tearful eyes. They do not possess the intellectual capacity, and discipline, to engage in constructive blocking.

The true Blocker enters a higher plane of consciousness, Grasshopper.

Step 1 - Clear the mind - that didn't take long did it.
Step 2 - Fill the void so that it is now Chock-a-Block with Negativity [that's negativity in the positive sense, you understand. Just go with me].
Step 3 - Skip to the table * Blockitty-Block, Blockitty-Block * [that was just a sound effect i threw in to enhance your online experience].
Step 4 - Move to the right, block and block. Move to the left, block and block. Back to the middle, block and block. And so forth. Cha-cha-cha. Cha-cha-cha.

As the 'Special One' [Waldi] said - "Just Block, Baby". [Well, he should have said it anyway].


first paragraph........streaky hypocritical bad tempered........i wonder who you mean:popcorn:

[DaveR]

Well i have to say i can think of a few players around the country who fit the bill nevermind just north!

[Blocking Ace]

The Art of Blocking [Extract Part 12]

"Aah, aah --- aah, aah
Does anyone know the way, did we hear someone say;
We just haven't got a clue what to do;
Does anyone know the way, there's just got to be a way;
To BlockBuster"
[The Sweet, c. early 1970s]

Well, if you follow this guide, it will give you 'a clue what to do', and show you 'the way'.

A BlockBuster is achieved when [excluding serves obviously], the Blocker manages to win a game 11-0 using block shots only.
It is the equivalent of the snooker '147' clearance.

----
As famously said on the classic 1980s tv quiz 'Blockbusters':
"Can I have a 'B' please, Bob?"
"Yes of course. What 'B' means to obstruct the path of something, and rhymes with clock, dock, and lock?"
"That will be 'Block', Bob".
"Correct [...] that's Blockbusters!!" [...] "You've won the car, speedboat, and skiing holiday".
-----

So, the Block has been a popular cultural icon for decades [remember the 'Blockadder' comedy series too].

And now, if you will excuse me, Dr. Block is suffering from Writer's block.
Happy Blocking.

[Spongebob!]

:pray:....Amen...!

Spongey (top blocker...rub at everything else...!!!)

[TheMoose]

The Art of Blocking [Extract Part 12]

"Aah, aah --- aah, aah
Does anyone know the way, did we hear someone say;
We just haven't got a clue what to do;
Does anyone know the way, there's just got to be a way;
To BlockBuster"
[The Sweet, c. early 1970s]

Well, if you follow this guide, it will give you 'a clue what to do', and show you 'the way'.

A BlockBuster is achieved when [excluding serves obviously], the Blocker manages to win a game 11-0 using block shots only.
It is the equivalent of the snooker '147' clearance.

----
As famously said on the classic 1980s tv quiz 'Blockbusters':
"Can I have a 'B' please, Bob?"
"Yes of course. What 'B' means to obstruct the path of something, and rhymes with clock, dock, and lock?"
"That will be 'Block', Bob".
"Correct [...] that's Blockbusters!!" [...] "You've won the car, speedboat, and skiing holiday".
-----

So, the Block has been a popular cultural icon for decades [remember the 'Blockadder' comedy series too].

And now, if you will excuse me, Dr. Block is suffering from Writer's block.
Happy Blocking.

This guy is the extreme block expert!

[Blocking Ace]

Doc Block is currently on a lecture tour [entitled Vintage Blocking, taking in Stockholm, Paris, Dortmund, and Carlisle.

As his agent, i hope that you found some sections of The Art of Blocking useful.

We are currently in negotiations with BBC3 for a 10-part series called 'Strictly Blocking' [although we would prefer the title 'Master Block', and for the programme to be aired on BBC2, after 'MasterChef' - "Blocking doesn't get any tougher"].

The Doctor may return for an 'Any Questions' section, answering a wide range of queries [not necessarily restricted to table tennis blocking].

Ladies and Gentlemen -- Doc Block has left the building.